Essay (second draft)

Have you already talked to your girls about sex?

“I was never told about sex before” said Vanessa Guzman, a twelve-year-old girl from El Limon-Maracay, when she was asked the reason why she had decided to have a sexual relation. Her parents said that they had not talked to her about sex because they thought she was not ready to hear about this complex, and for them, embarrassing topic, what they did not take into account was that she was about to reach puberty, and that was the best age to start. On the other hand, Vanessa said that her parents never gave her opportunities to ask questions related to sex and that was why she decided to search for information everywhere except her own home. Vanessa asked the wrong person and now she is pregnant. Therefore, parents should talk openly about sex to their girls before they reach puberty and after they have developed patterns of behavior.One of the biggest problems girls are facing today is the black hole that exists between their parents and them. Most of the times, talking to their girls about a complex topic such as sex, represents a difficult job for parents, and what they do not take into consideration is that nobody can play this role better than them. Here some questions are needed to be answered, why is it difficult for parents to talk about sex to their girls? Sometimes it could be because they do not know when to start raising issues about sex and sexuality, or they do not consider that their girls are mature enough, and they avoid answering the possible questions or doubts their girls might have. As a result, girls lose their parents trust, and they choose to search information in different places except their own home. Moreover, parents think they have solved a big problem, but, have they really done it? What they do is to push their girls into a world that can affect their patterns of behavior and beliefs without realizing it. Nowadays young girls can get information about sex everywhere they go; seeing women who sell their bodies in the streets, or pornography on the web shows clearly how drastic society has changed, and how a sexual relation can be misunderstood. Consequently, girls keep in their minds a wrong concept about what a sexual relation really is, and have no idea about how dangerous it can finish.According to Simon Forrest, Director, Sex Education Forum, UK and Annabel Kanabus, Director, AVERT, UK, “The precise age at which information related to sex should be provided depends on the physical, emotional an intellectual development of the young girls as well as their level of understanding” However, in most of the cases, girls who have not reached puberty, specifically between the age of nine to eleven years, can be considered as people ready to start talking about sex and sexuality. Most parents could delay having conversations related to sex with their girls maybe because they think it is easier for them to promote the choice of abstinence among their girls than provide reliable information to them. Even though parents believe that their “little girls” should not have sex until they get married, they must consider providing basic information about what a sexual relation involves; for instance, how feelings can take part in any sexual activity or not, contraception, etc, and as a result, avoid irremediable consequences such as sexual transmission diseases, viruses that can attack their bodies, and unwanted pregnancy.Nowadays, it must be relevant for parents to keep a healthy communication with their daughters, although, it is necessary to start as earlier as possible preferably between nine to ten years old and talk freely and openly about sex in order to get their daughters’ trust. Also it is known that is complicated for parents to take a sit with their girls and explain issues associated to sex, like for instance, where babies come from, but the important thing is to discard the same old story about the stork and start putting the feet on the ground, and realize that their girls are able to know more than they can expect. Maybe parents could look for professional help so they can feel less stressful when puberty has come to their girls.Overall, the sooner parents start talking about sex to their girls the better. What they have to take into consideration is that the main role they have to play is to try to keep their young girls away from negative influences that can affect their development, an also their lives. For this reason, parents should start raising issues about sex and sexuality to their girls before they reach puberty and before anybody else does it for them.